Pay Us to Roast You Harder
The free roast gives you the burn. The premium one gives you the blueprint.
Free Roast
Just a Taste
$0 one-time
- Quick AI roast (1-2 minutes)
- Summary of top issues
- Punchy one-liners
- Limited recommendations
Most Popular
Pro Roast
Bring the Heat
$29 one-time
- Full AI breakdown of SEO, UX, speed, and conversion
- Specific recommendations for fixes
- Prioritized action list
- Competitor comparison
- Downloadable PDF roast report
Agency Roast
Roast Squad Edition
$99 per site
- All of Pro Roast
- White-label report
- Shareable link with custom branding
- Up to 3 site comparisons
- Priority support
Why Pay?
You can't fix what you don't fully understand. The Pro Roast doesn't just tell you what's wrong — it tells you what to do next. Think of it as tough love with a to-do list.
"This roast hurt... but my bounce rate dropped 25%."
- Sarah K., E-commerce Founder
"The Agency Roast made me look smart in front of a client. 10/10 would burn again."
- Mike R., Digital Agency Owner
Frequently Asked Questions
Is the free roast really free?
Yep. No credit card, no catch.
How long does it take?
Free: minutes. Pro: about 5-10 minutes.
Is this actually helpful or just jokes?
It's both. We roast with purpose.